Alicia knows there’s no such thing as a free lunch. She also knows exactly what her landlord Gerald wants when he offers her the room at half the market rate. She’s not stupid. She’s broke, both financially and emotionally.
You don’t really hear young Singaporean adults renting a room on their own before they get married. Not unless there are some special reasons.
Most of my peers stay with their parents until they get married, some until their BTO are ready. Usually when you hear people renting a room on their own, it comes with a few standard reasons.
‘Oh, i wants privacy and independence.’
‘Just want to change of environment’
‘Closer to my place of work’
‘Experience a different lifestyle, get out of my comfort zone’
I used reason number 4 if you must know.
I want a different lifestyle alright, and to get out of my discomfort zone.
What do i mean?
Growing up in a 3 room flat in the old part of Redhill estate with 4 siblings, my parents and a uncle that sexually abused me since i was 14, what would you have done?
I have never been happier getting my first pay cheque and being able to make rent deposit with some savings i stashed away over the years. Getting away from my unsupportive, toxic family was one of the best decision of my life.
I’ve been renting a room, sharing a studio, hell i’ve even tried renting in JB and crossing the border every day. Anything to get away from my family. I thought that was my life until i met the man of my life.
James.
We hit it off right away, got together officially within a month of going out.
Unlike me, James is ‘that’ typical Singaporean growing up. Own room in 5 room HDB flat across from Tampines mall. Own TV in the room, own computer, own bed. Well i spent plenty of time there, but it’s not the same as having my own place, even if it’s rented.
We dated for 2 years, he asked if we should BTO together which i take it to be a proposal. We applied, got thrown a ballot to the far flung side of Tengah and then it comes the wait. How do you define ‘Ulu’ in Singapore?
Not Ulu Pandan ok? That is where the rich people lives.
My version of Ulu, is you take google map. Then you key in the address, then you look at the satellite image.
It’s still forest.
Then the roads and lines are like superimposed onto the forest.
You drag the yellow man and dropped it onto the road, and you know what you see?
A zinc roof makeshift temple in the middle of the forest, then blurred out faces of construction workers sleeping under a tree.
Yay, that is my future postal code.
James asked me to stop renting and just move into his room.
I love to, it’s tempting but it’s not appropriate. We’re not officially married, and James’ mother is the traditional kind.
She will make snarky remarks.
‘Woman, stay over often at men’s place, make them appear cheap’
What the fuck?
Cheap?
I cheap?
‘Girls, shouldn’t always stay out late. They must go back early. Only those bad girls stay out’
‘Girls that drink, go clubbing and party, aiyoh. those girls terrible, wear those revealing clothes.’
Can you believe that? She’s saying it as a passing remark but it was all aimed at me.
Why don’t she ask her son the kind of shit he ask me to do for him?
Ask me to wear black panty hose and high heels, sit on his computer chair while he kneel down in front of me. Then start kissing and licking my feet until i feel disgusted but got to continue pretending i’m enjoying his fetish?
And i’m to wear those one piece sheer body hose with lace he buys from taobao sometimes when we have sex.
Cosplay as some tennis player, don’t know what sailormoon rubbish, and don’t get me started on his school uniform shit. He literally bought a collection of 2nd hand uniforms off carousell and wants me to wear them during sex when he was in the mood.
Ask me to sit over his face while he licks me then start slurping and drinking whatever is dripping into his mouth?
Make me play with my own boobs and use a dildo on myself while he stands in front of me and masturbate? And he made me call out his friends’ names.
And i’m the cheap one?
I wish i can shoot back in her face.
Alicia : hello Auntie…you know the kind of sick fetish your son have or not? You know your son read erotic stories online or not? You know he got subscribe to an army of erotic writers?
I’m sorry, i just need to spit out my rants.
James and i got the ROM out of the way, but to his mother, unless we’re down with the hotel banquet and tea ceremony in front of all relatives, we are not considered married. It’s not enough that the law considers us husband and wife, it has to be by her standard.
James and i, we have normal sex most of the time. Sometimes he just gets a bit too experimental but i’m ok with it. I tolerated it. He’s a nice guy, very sweet, just a little too mummy’s boy. Still, i love him, and i look forward to building a life with him in the future. He is also my escape from my family, something to cling onto for a new life.
I’ve tolerated a lot in my life and i could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I thought my current rental lease could end on time when our BTO is ready, but there was a delay with the renovation. James wasn’t helpful at all, leaving me to deal with the coordination.
James : I just pay can liao right?
I gave up trying to argue with him, but the 3 month delay meant i needed a temporary place for another 3 months. One would think James’ would ask me to stay at his place to save money but no.
Cannot.
Girl will be ‘cheap’ if she stays over at her lawfully married spouse’ place without the tea ceremony. Which meant i needed a short term rental. And since i dump most of my savings and all into the BTO and renovation, i was on a really tight budget but i can make it work.
I always do.
Once our BTO renovation is complete, i can stop renting, move into the forest, i meant Tengah. And everything will be ok.
Meanwhile though, not everything is ok.
Not for me situation at least.
My rent now is $750, a master bedroom in Tiong Bahru. Including internet, utilities and i can cook anytime i want. Hell i can have aircon on 24 hours if i wanted.
Before you start, I know. Master bedroom with master bath in Tiong Bahru for $750. In 2026?
Alicia, Mai lai la. You’re just being a cannon fairy now.
You’re already doing the math. The last time I checked PropertyGuru, the going rate for a room this size, in this estate, with the MRT five minutes away and Tiong Bahru Market downstairs, was $1,800 minimum. $1,900 if the landlord had done up the kitchen. Gerald’s kitchen has an induction hob from Courts that still has the protective film on one corner, and a fridge that dispenses ice and cold, filtered water.
And i’m only paying $750.
What’s the catch?
I’m not the kind of woman who pretends she doesn’t notice things, or rather, the way men look at me.
Gerald is fifty-two, divorced for three years, retired from something in marine engineering, now apparently lives off rental income and whatever he does on his laptop all day.
He dresses like a typical uncle, Polo tee tucked into belted shorts. Slippers. Gold watch. He smelled like medicated oil and sandalwood incense.
When i view the place for the first time, i was interested in the common room for 1.2k, but he made me an offer for the Master.
Gerald : You know Alicia…you looked like a nice…girl. If you like, i can let you have the master bedroom … for a good price.
Alicia : Mr Teo, Common on the market is easily 1.2 here, already at the top of my budget, i cannot afford the master.
Gerald : Call me Gerald lah.
He smiled when he said that. Not a creepy smile. That’s what made it worse. It was the smile of a man who is completely comfortable in his in his own skin, behaving like a total creep.
Gerald : You say you married, right? Your husband, he staying here also?
Alicia : No. He stays with his parents in Tampines. Our BTO not ready yet. Contractor delay. You know how it is.
Gerald : Wah, separate ah? Newlywed but separate. That one tough.
Alicia : It’s temporary.
Gerald : Everything also temporary.
He showed me the kitchen after that.
Gerald : you can cook anything, anytime you want. Kitchen and fridge is free to use.
Then there’s the 65-inch TV mounted on the wall. Whatever marine engineering paid, it paid well, because it came with all the subscription you can name.
I moved in on a Tuesday. James helped me carry the boxes. He met Gerald. They shook hands. James said “thanks for taking care of my wife, uncle” and I wanted to bite through my own tongue.
Gerald is fifty-two, not seventy. And James, still sweet and clueless, didn’t notice a single thing.
He didn’t notice that Gerald held my hand a second too long when he passed me the keys.
He didn’t notice that there was only one set of keys for the main door.
He didn’t notice that the lock on my bedroom door was the electronic kind where Gerald knew the master code.
James kissed me goodbye at the door, told me to jia you with the renovation follow-up, and drove his mother’s Toyota back to Tampines.
When the door shut, leaving me alone with Gerald in the 5 room HDB flat, i could feel this tingle, no, shiver creeping up my body.
Shiver what shiver Alicia?
You’ve seen and met enough people in your shitty life.
There’s no such thing as a free lunch. No such thing as a 750 a month master bedroom in Tiong Bahru on a short lease either.
I knew. Don’t pretend you don’t know what I knew.
I accepted Gerald’s offer, and by that, i knew it will come with…consequences.
Coming soon