This is as raw as it gets.

This piece is inspired by a real account share with me by a couple.

I have my doubts about the meet up. I’m also worried it might be a prank.

After all, we have only been communicating through email for the past 2 years.

The whole meetup was coordinated through email. Email, in this day and age might seem ancient when there are messaging apps which gives you instantaneous reply. From whether the message has been sent to whether the intended recipient has read your message.

I wanted to take the discussion offline but the couple only wanted to communicate through email.

Benny and Brenda have been married for the past 5 years and between the two of them, they have a secret that not many people knew.

Brenda is a rape victim and this is something that not even her parents knew. It was not reported to the police as well and the culprit got away with it.

Benny did not mind Brenda’s past and he love her for who she is. With an equally hurtful history in relationships, Benny met Brenda around the darkest period for both of their lives. They clicked instantly and the rest is history.

As husband and wife, they shared a lot with each other, basically everything but certain subjects, it has always been difficult for Brenda to open up to her husband.

There is a mental barrier that is hard to get through.

Benny has been trying to get Brenda to open up about the incident so she can move past it. It just so happened that one day, he chanced upon his wife reading some erotic stories that I wrote online.

He got curious why his wife is reading erotic works that centres around women being imprisoned in a facility and used as tools for satisfying the sexual needs of men.

Without telling his wife, Benny started reading too, curious about what his wife is digesting on the site. After a month, Benny dropped me a mail and we kept in contact ever since.

He brought his wife into the mailing list and the 3 of us have talked a lot the past couple of years. It started with plotlines and stories, before the two of them gave me ideas of kinky stuff they have done.

They shared with me their pictures, and even allowed me to use some of them for my work if I promise to hide their faces.

We’re really open in our discussion, basically anything goes when they say I could ask them anything I want when it comes to their private sex life.

Anything except that incident.

The incident that happened to Brenda when she was barely 21.

Throughout their years of marriage, Brenda have revealed snippets of her rape ordeal to Benny, usually in bits and pieces. It’s difficult for her to talk about the incident even though it happened many years ago.

During Covid however, with the couple spending a lot more time together working from home, she started talking a little to Benny about that faithful day.

Brenda was the one who volunteered the information about her ordeal, much to the surprise of Benny.

I got a background story about what transpired, and I was intrigued. Do note that Brenda was kept in the mailing list at all times and there are no game of shadows between the men trying to pry for information.

I read a summary of what happened on my screen over and over again, trying to picture every scene, every moment. It was like a drug. I wanted to know more. Actually, I want to hear it from the horse’s mouth especially when Brenda saw fit to reply to the emails clarifying a couple of things in her own words.

It took a while for it to sink in that I was actually reading a real rape account of someone. An account that is not sensationalised by the media, not exaggerated by a writer, and not filtered down by the victim.

I lie awake at night thinking about the emails we exchanged and I could not hold it in any longer.

The curiosity in me demands to be fed with answers.

So I dropped Benny and Brenda an email, if I could buy them a meal, or a coffee. I would love to find out more about what happened, if they are comfortable to share that is. Tell it to me in my face. Being able to look at me in the eyes and tell me what happened that day would really help me in my future writings.

Then the email went dark. The replies stopped.

I overstepped my boundaries is seemed.

I sent an apology email, I knew I should have been more sensitive about the whole situation given how touchy the issue is. I wasn’t thinking with my own head, I was thinking with my dick.

With no replies for a week, I thought this lead is dead. This unofficial electronic pen pal relationship that we shared over 2 years is now gone.

They will not be replying me anymore until I received a mail from Brenda herself a few days before Chinese New Year.

This is the exact word for word reproduction of the email Brenda sent me. I masked out the date and location for privacy purpose.

“ Hi James, would you be available for lunch on xx/2/2021. I know it’s the festive period but this is the only time we can make it. We can host you at our place, postal code xxxxxx. You can publish what happened, I only ask that you keep our identities a secret and to let us approve your writing before you publish it. I will try to answer your questions to the best of my ability.

No pictures and videos, no phone, no laptop, no smartwatches or tablet in the room.


I cannot describe the feeling after I read the mail. I immediately agreed without even thinking of my own visiting plans for Chinese New Year.

Soon, I find myself standing at the block of flats based on the postal code given to me during the festive period. I even brought oranges I shit you not. I’m dressed in a red top and pants, looking every bit like a visitor to the elders house for that festive period.

I could see families dressed for the occasions heading into lifts and going to the carpark as I loitered around the lobby. Loitering and waiting for the email. No phone numbers, no messaging apps, only emails.

It’s either that or nothing.

My heart was beating really fast as the clock ticked closer to the agreed meeting time. I kept refreshing my email, eager to see a new incoming envelope.

The postal code gave me the location of the street and the block, but I have no idea which unit it is.

I dropped the couple a mail the moment I reached 10 minutes before the agreed timing and have been eagerly waiting for a reply since.

Finally the email came and it asked what I was wearing. I replied the mail and informed Benny that I’m waiting at the lobby below their flat.

You know the lifts have display panels showing which level it’s stopped at ?

My eyes immediately went to the 3 lifts at that block of flats.

The lifts of the 17 level flats are parked at 1, 9 & 17.

So unless someone calls for the lifts, they remained parked at those levels.

A few moments after I replied, I saw the lift on the ground floor and 17th floor start to move. Someone just called for a lift.

It could be Benny, or it could be someone else, I don’t know.

I only know the anticipation is killing me.

My eyes went to the lift that is coming down from the 17th. The number on the display panel kept descending.

I exhaled and stared at the lift door.

Unsure of what to expect.

The numbers kept descending until it hit level 1.

When the lift door opened, I immediately had my breath taken away by the sight in front of me. It’s a woman dressed in a white singlet with a red flared skirt. She was wearing flip flops and looked like she just came home from some visiting and just changed into something a bit more casual.

The lady was wearing a mask for obvious reasons, but from her eyes alone, you could see that beneath the mask, lies a beauty. Those are really nice and round seductive eyes.

She’s petite, really small built at 150cm but she’s not thin. She has the curves and I would put her weight to be about 48kg. She will look good in high heels and a tight body con dress.

Our eyes met and she gave me the once over, no doubt confirming the dressing base on what I described in the mail.

She smiled at me nervously with her eyes and my heart stopped beating when she approached me cautiously while looking around the lift lobby.

“Happy new year James.”

“Happy new year Brenda.” I said with an appreciative nod.

She gestured to the lift and I walked in after her, keeping a respectful distance.

Lift moments are the most awkward especially with people you hardly know for obvious reasons. You don’t know whether to talk and if to talk, what will the conversation topic be.

Brenda saved me the awkwardness by adjusting her hair and removing her mask because in her hurry to come down and get me, she got the straps of her mask tangled up with some stray bits of her hair.

With her mask off, I realised how beautiful she is. Her features look good and for someone who appreciates beauty, I can tell she is photogenic as well. Features like this, figures like hers, they look darn good on camera.

She was not wearing makeup and I was about to compliment her looks when I gasped and pointed a finger at her while my eyes widened in surprise. It finally dawned on me who she is.

“Oh my god.. you.. I know you..” I said

Before I could finished Brenda replaced her mask and gave me a warning look.

“Don’t you dare tell anyone. “ She said with eyes that are almost screaming at me.

The lift opened just then, and Benny was there waiting for me.

“Happy New Year James. “ Benny said.

“Happy New year bro.”

I shook hands with the couple even though we were not supposed to due to Covid 19. My heart started beating faster than ever.

They are real people. No longer just a string of email addresses I talk to electronically.

And Bloody hell.

Brenda is practically famous on Tik Tok.

Coming soon

9000 words